


i took a couple shots and now im dizzy

by lilackitsune



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Alcohol, Drunk Ushijima, Drunken Shenanigans, Established Relationship, M/M, Partying, but i like it, i have, long-suffering semi eita, no idea what this is, tendou is a good partner, this is just some funny shit i decided to write, why isnt that an official tag
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-30
Updated: 2020-11-30
Packaged: 2021-03-10 00:20:40
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,960
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27795247
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lilackitsune/pseuds/lilackitsune
Summary: wakatoshi wasn’t one to party. nor did he see the appeal of alcohol or binge drinking. his mother had once let him take a sip of her sake and he remembers the way she burst out laughing at the face he made when the liquid hit the back of his throat. she said it resembled a disgusted cow.he had no desire to let that emotion produce onto his face ever again.orushijima gets drunk for the first time. tendou takes care of him.
Relationships: Tendou Satori/Ushijima Wakatoshi
Comments: 12
Kudos: 98





	i took a couple shots and now im dizzy

**Author's Note:**

> girl ion know what the fuck this is but i had a Thot that ushi wushi would be a hilarious/totally ooc drunk messy bitch. so i Wrote it.
> 
> sorry if this sucks its my first hq fic kekekeke but if it sucks leave a comment anyway its all about the validation of the numbers anyway 🤪
> 
> jkjk but i hope you enjoy!
> 
> title from "after party" by don toliver

Wakatoshi wasn’t one to party.

He didn’t really understand them, to be honest. Had previously watched those coming of age movies with wild and ridiculous house parties, irresponsible teenagers, and copious amounts of alcohol and simply– never saw the appeal. Nor did he see the appeal of alcohol or binge drinking. His mother had once let him take a sip of her sake and he remembers the way she burst out laughing at the face he made when the liquid hit the back of his throat. She said it resembled a disgusted cow. 

He had no desire to let that emotion produce onto his face ever again.

Rather, Wakatoshi would much rather spend time tending to the wide array of houseplants sitting on the windowsill of his dorm room, carefully tilting his watering can to deliver the perfect amount and facing them towards the sun for maximum nutrients.

Not that he judged anyone who partied.

It just wasn’t the particular environment that he felt he would be comfortable in.

If other people’s serotonin levels rose from partaking in those types of activities, then Wakatoshi had no business nitpicking anyone’s happiness.

He hadn’t much been to any parties or consumed any alcohol in his short time at university thus far.

That was, until one night.

––––––––––––––––––––

“Ushijima-kun! Come take a shot with us!” a senpai from his university’s volleyball team cheered, slinging an arm across the first-year’s shoulders and pulling him to where the rest of the team was circled around the table of tall glass bottles and red solo cups.

Wakatoshi stiffened at the touch but didn’t resist. He simply blinked at his senpai, calculating. It had been almost a month but Wakatoshi still hadn’t quite mastered all of his teammates' names yet. He wasn’t very good at personal stuff like that. In high school, it had taken him three months and a long suffering sigh from Semi to realize that Goshiki’s name was not Goichi, as Wakatoshi had been calling the first year.

He continued looking at the boy bringing him into the circle of his teammates, trying to remember his name. _Akayoshi? Akitsugu? Or did it start with an E…_

He was broken out of his thoughts when a hand shoved a shot glass to his chest, filled to the brim with an unidentified clear liquid. Wakatoshi didn’t have much time to analyze what the contents of the shot glass were before the team was lifting their respective glasses in the air and clinking them with a loud cheer. The boys around him all brought the glass to their lips and Wakatoshi couldn’t help but mimic the action, not wanting to be left out as he swallowed down the bitter liquid in a single gulp.

He must have made the same face he made when he tried his mother’s sake, because his teammates around him were laughing with wide, dopey grins.

“Ushijima-kun! Have you never drank before?!” another senpai slurred across from his, wiping a tear from his eye.

Wakatoshi simply blinked, face blank. “Only once, briefly. How could you tell I’m not experienced?”

“ _How could we tell?!_ ” the senpai that dragged him over cackled, finally releasing Wakatoshi from his grasp. “Your face told us _for_ you! I’ve never seen so much emotion come outta you Ushijima-kun!”

The rest of the team laughed in good nature and after that, the rest of the night began to pass in a blur. Shot glasses and plastic cups were pushed his way from every direction with promises of _this is the best brand of nihonshu!_ and _have you ever tried soju??_ _it’s korean!_ and _american beer is kind of disgusting but it makes you feel like you’re in the movies!_

After only an hour, Wakatoshi had tried maybe 12 different kinds of alcohol. He probably should have refused them all, but seeing the looks of anticipation from his fellow teammates to see his reaction to each of them brought him just a minuscule bit of amusement.

He didn’t _think_ he was feeling anything from it. In fact, he felt fine. Totally like himself and still as level headed as always. Wakatoshi leaned against the wall, taking small sips of what someone had called “jungle juice.” He didn’t quite understand why it was called that since it was made in the kitchen just five feet away rather than any jungle nearby. But he liked the taste of it compared to the other drinks he had tried; it was fruity and didn’t sting when he swallowed it down.

He felt fine. Until, of course, he saw none other than one fiery flamed redhead barge open the door of the house enthusiastically and announce his presence to the party.

“I’m _heeerrrreeee!_ ” Tendou proclaimed, arms high in the air and eyes crinkled as he grinned widely. Wakatoshi couldn’t help the tug that pulled at the corner of his lips seeing his best friend stride into the room like he owned the place. Tendou did have a knack of attracting all the attention on to him.

Walking through the threshold behind him were Semi and Reon, the grey-haired boy with an unimpressed look on his face while the latter shot a warm smile in the Wakatoshi’s direction.

He was glad to see his friends. The four of them were inseparable at this point, all choosing to go to the same university despite only Wakatoshi continuing his volleyball career. It was reassuring to have some familiarity in a new environment, comforting to have people to fall back on who he knew and trusted.

Wakatoshi began slowly walking towards his friends, about to throw them a small smile as he caught Tendou’s eyes when he seemingly tripped over his own feet, stumbling clumsily into Tendou’s arms and almost spilling the contents of his red solo cup all over the other boy.

Clumsily.

Wakatoshi remained in the red head’s arms for just a second as his eyebrows creased in confusion.

_Clumsily._

He doesn’t recall a time in his life when he had ever done anything _clumsily_. Everything Wakatoshi did was perfect. Perfectly calculated, perfectly planned. There was no room for clumsy.

So why had he just tripped over his own feet.

“BAHAHA!” Tendou howled in laughter, wrapping his arms tighter where he was holding Wakatoshi’s waist and righting him on his feet. He nuzzled his face into Ushijima’s neck as he said, “You almost wiped the fuck out, Toshi! Don’t tell me you’re _drunk!_ ”

“I did not wipe anything. I think I just misstepped,” Wakatoshi replied simply.

“It’s a figure of speech– oh, whatever,” Tendou sighed.

Now that Wakatoshi had his bearings together he could appreciate the boy clinging to him. He wrapped a strong arm around Tendou’s shoulders as the slightly shorter boy looked up at him with crinkled eyes. Wakatoshi felt a warmth run through his chest; a warmth that he only ever felt when he was in the presence of Tendou: his best friend, his first true friend that had become something more in the time they’ve known each other.

Wakatoshi wasn’t entirely sure what they were to each other. _I don’t like labels! They make me feel tied down!_ Tendou had once said after a particularly long makeout session. Ushijima respected that. He didn’t care about labels. Truthfully, he probably didn’t know all of them anyway. But he knew he cared about Satori, he knew Satori cared about him, and he knew that they loved and trusted each other more than they had loved and trusted anyone else in their lives.

As he continued looking at the boy holding him, a smile tugged at the corner of Wakatoshi’s lips and his eyes fluttered as he began leaning down, lower and lower until he reached Tendou’s soft–

“So, are you going to show us where the drinks are or are we just going to have to figure that out for ourselves while you guys suck face?” Semi dry panned, interrupting Tendou and Wakatoshi’s moment.

Reon chuckled, scratching the back of his neck as the pair in front him separated just slightly, Tendou still clinging to Wakatoshi’s middle. “Speaking of drinks,” Reon chimed. “I thought you didn’t drink alcohol, Ushijima.”

“I don’t usually. But the team thought the face I made while taking a shot was amusing, so they gave me more alcohol to try. I have sampled twelve different types so far,” Wakatoshi answered, face blank.

“What the?!?!”

“ _Twelve?!?!”_

“How are you even _alive_ right now?!” Tendou prodded, voice a mixture concern and almost– pride?

Wakatoshi looked down at his chaotic partner, replying with genuine sincerity, “I am breathing oxygen. The oxygen goes to my blood, which pumps through my veins–”

“BAHAHA! You’re so silly, Toshi! I can’t believe people think you don’t have a sense of humor,” Tendou cried out, wiping tears from his eyes as he laughed. Wakatoshi tilted his head just slightly. He had not been joking.

Semi spoke up, coming up beside him and putting an arm on his shoulder. “I think what Tendou meant is: you’re not drunk right now? You’ve had twelve drinks in a pretty short amount of time, you should probably be feeling something.”

“Unless you’re a major heavyweight which, honestly, I wouldn’t be surprised if you were, Ushijima,” Reon added.

Wakatoshi blinked. “I am not that heavy. Only about 85 kilograms. Does my weight have something to do with how my alcohol consumption affects me? I feel a slight buzz in my head.”

Semi breathed out a long suffering sigh before turning in the direction of the kitchen. “I need a shot of tequila after being a part of this conversation. Or four.”

Reon barked out a laugh as he followed the grey haired boy. Wakatoshi moved to follow them before Tendou brought him back, bringing their faces close together once again.

“I hope you didn’t have too much fun at this party without me, Toshi-chan,” the red head drawled, bringing a hand up to rest on Wakatoshi’s neck.

He liked the warmth that radiated from Satori’s hands; he liked how Satori’s touches made him feel safe. “You know I never reach the full potential of what could be considered fun unless you’re here,” he answered seriously.

“Ugh! What a sap!” Tendou pretended to gag, but his smile was wide. Finally, he rose on his tip toes and brought Wakatoshi in for a short and sweet kiss.

It wasn’t anything special but it still made Wakatoshi’s heart beat faster in his chest. His heart tended to do that a lot when Satori was around.

“I hope you’re not just saying that because you’re drunk!” Tendou joked as he pulled away with a grin, grabbing Wakatoshi by the hand and pulling him where Semi and Reon had gone. “But if you are, I’m gonna have to match you in drunkness!”

––––––––––––––––––––

After catching up with Semi and Reon in the kitchen, Tendou insisted on teaching Wakatoshi how to take a shot of tequila ( _“No, no, Toshi-chan! You’re supposed to lick the salt off of your hand, not sprinkle it in the drink!” “I don’t think licking things off my hand is very sanitary.”_ ). After the three of his friends cackled at his reaction to sucking on the lime, a few of his teammates called on him to play a game of “beer pong” and Tendou pushed him off with a smile, encouraging him to “bond with his teammates.”

A half an hour and three games of beer pong later, Ushijima stumbled back into the living room where he knew Tendou and the rest of them were. Except he didn’t stumble, no, why would he stumble? Ushijima never stumbled, he was too good at everything to do something so clumsy. He was absolutely not drunk at all and he felt _totally_ fine, he thought to himself as he walked into a wall. No wait, the wall was just placed in an inconvenient location so it wasn’t his fault. Except, _oh_ , Wakatoshi thought as he shook his head and blinked blearily, clearing his vision. He didn’t just bump into a wall, that was a person. And not just any person but _Tendou_ , who was now holding him steady as he swayed and flashing him an amused grin.

Wakatoshi sent him a lazy grin back and then his eyes widened as a large and _loud_ burp bubbled up his throat and out of his mouth.

Tendou and him stood staring at each other for all of five seconds before Wakatoshi _snorted_ ( _snorted!_ ) and began letting out a hearty laugh. Tendou’s eyes widened for just a second before he spit out his drink and began cackling maniacally along with Wakatoshi, the pair’s laughter bouncing off the walls along with the pounding music from the stereo.

“Have you ever seen Ushijima laugh like that?” Semi mumbled to Reon from the corner of his mouth.

Reon responded just as quiet, wide eyes never leaving the laughing pair. “I’m not sure if I’ve ever seen him laugh at all.”

“He must be _really_ drunk then.”

Semi and Reon watched fondly as the pair’s laughter finally began to subside, still holding onto each other as Tendou wiped tears from his eyes. Wakatoshi looked at Satori with slightly glazed eyes and a lingering smile on his face before he declared:

“I would like to have intercourse with you tonight.”

And wrapped his arms the fiery redhead, snuggling his face into Satori’s neck as if he didn’t just announce to the whole party his sexual goals for the night.

Tendou’s eyes popped out of his head at the declaration, Semi spit his drink all over the expensive rug of the living room, and Reon simply clapped a hand over his mouth, unsure if he wanted to laugh or cry. Tendou chuckled, pulling Wakatoshi back so he could look the other boy in the eye. Apparently, however, that was too much work for Ushijima, whose body went almost completely lax while being held in Tendou’s arms, eyes half-lidded and head bobbing around as if he were about to pass out.

“How much have you had to drink, Toshi?” Satori wondered, holding onto Ushijima’s shoulders and shaking slightly, just to make sure the other boy was _alive_.

“I’m not– _hiccup!_ – I’m not entirely sure anymore,” the dark haired boy slurred, a lazy grin plastered on his face.

Tendou tsked, a slight smirk hinting at his smile as Wakatoshi slumped back into his arms. “I think you’ve had a little too much. You’re not acting like yourself! Not that I mind all the physical contact.”

“I feel perfectly fine, Satori,” Wakatoshi slowly peeled himself out of Tendou’s hold as if to prove his point. When his eyes met the redhead’s however, he simply blinked, losing all train of thought. “You’re so beautiful, Satori,” Wakatoshi blurted, retreating back into the safe space of Tendou’s arms as he continued his drunk mumblings. “I’m in love with you. I’m so in love with you. You’re the most beautiful person I’ve ever met. I love having intercourse with you. You’re so good at intercourse…”

At this point, all Tendou could do was hold back his laughter and gently stroke the hair at the back of Wakatoshi’s head. His cheeks flushed in embarrassment at Wakatoshi’s drunk ramblings as well as at Semi and Reon sitting just a few meters away, laughing hysterically at the state of the large and usually serious volleyball player that was currently confessing his sexual desires into the skin of Tendou’s neck.

“Toshi, we should probably head back to the dorms soon...I don't think you should drink anymore,” Tendou suggested, half amused and half concerned at his partner’s state.

Wakatoshi abruptly left his place in Tendou’s neck to look at the other boy with wide eyes. “Go back to the dorms? To have sex?”  
  
“BAHAHA! No, silly! You’re way too drunk for that,” Tendou chided, lightheartedly smacking Wakatoshi’s chest. He didn’t miss the way Ushijima _pouted._

With a giggle, Tendou wrapped an arm around Wakatoshi’s waist, dragging his stumbling body along as they said their farewells.

“Leaving already, Ushijima-kun?” one of his teammates called out during their round of goodbyes.

Wakatoshi leveled the other man with a straight face as he announces, “I believe I am intoxicated.”

The room erupted in laughter and with one last goodbye to Semi and Reon, Ushijima and Tendou made their way out the door and began the short trek back to the first year residence halls. Wakatoshi did _not_ make the journey easy; he tripped over his feet more often than not, insisted the pair stop to make out every five steps, and thought it would be a smart idea to start bursting out lyrics to “Gimme Chocolate!!” by BabyMetal at the top of his lungs. 

( _“How do you even know this song??”_ _Tendou asked_. 

_“You showed it to me. It’s one of your favorites.”_

_“You remembered that?”_

_“I remember everything you’ve ever told me,” Wakatoshi replied earnestly, eyes crinkled shut and the barest hint of a smile on his face._ )

When they _finally_ arrived at Wakatoshi’s dorm, it took another five minutes to open the door. Wakatoshi had wrapped his arms around Tendou’s waist as the redhead fumbled with the keys, peppering small kisses all over the other boy’s neck and mumbling things about how lovely Satori was, how he reminded Wakatoshi of the wild flaming petals of an Alstroemeria flower, of how _beautiful_ Satori was blah blah blah.

Tendou finally got the door open and ushered Wakatoshi inside quickly, fearing the wrath of their resident assistant who had been woken up by Ushijima’s singing. Turning back around after shutting and locking the door quickly, Tendou almost screamed as he was met with the sight of Wakatoshi in just his boxers, taking his shirt off.

It wasn’t so much that Tendou found the sight scary (quite the opposite, in fact), more so that 1. He always forgot how sexy Wakatoshi was underneath his modest clothes and 2. Tendou didn’t think the other boy was going to just immediately _strip_ after coming home.

“What are you doing?” Tendou squealed more than asked as Wakatoshi threw his shirt across the room and fixed Satori with a straight yet mischievous glare.

“The night is young, Satori.”

Tendou screamed internally once more, blushing. His _body_ wanted to just give in to Wakatoshi’s blunt advances but his mind and _morals_ for that matter knew that taking advantage of the other boy’s drunk state while he himself was sober would be cause for many problems. 

“The night is actually not young! It’s actually very _old_!” Tendou joked, gently pushing the other boy towards the bed. “The night is a grumpy old man and he is telling us that it’s time to go to bed! No time for sex Toshi-chan!”

Wakatoshi took Tendou’s pushes towards the bed as an invitation to place his hands on Satori’s shoulders. He attached his lips to the red haired boy’s neck, sucking at the soft place behind his ear that Wakatoshi knew was a weak spot for him. _Curse you Ushijima Wakatoshi_ , Tendou thought to himself, allowing the pair of them a moment of pleasure before bringing himself back to his senses. With a squeak and wide eyes, Tendou forcibly pushed Wakatoshi back onto the bed, detaching the boy’s lips from his neck.

“You’re very rough tonight, Satori. I like it,” Wakatoshi drawled as he sat on the bed clad only in his boxers, staring up at Tendou with dark eyes.

Satori just stared at Wakatoshi scandalized, hands at his chest. Oh, if only Ushijima was sober, Tendou lamented, then maybe he would act on the swell that was beginning to form at his crotch. Instead he reluctantly squeaked, “I’m gonna go to the bathroom!” and ran to the opposite side of the dorm, slamming the door as he made it inside.

“I’ll be waiting!” Wakatoshi’s muffled voice called from behind the door.

Tendou let out a deep sigh, moving from where he was resting at the door and standing in front of the bathroom mirror. He stared long and hard at his reflection before bursting out in a fit of laughter. _Miracle Boy Wakatoshi is a messy, messy drunk!_

Satori laughed in the bathroom, giving himself a couple minutes to calm down from Wakatoshi’s ridiculous displays of affection before splashing some water in his face and returning to the bedroom. He closed the bathroom door behind him slowly and turned to enthusiastically announce his return, arms in the air when Tendou stopped in his tracks at the sight in front of him.

“Mm?” he mused, stepping closer to the bed to more closely examine. Satori chuckled to himself, placing his hands on his hips as he smiled down at the boy below him. “Not as horny as we thought we were, huh Toshi-chan?” 

Satori shook his head with a laugh as he took in the sight of Wakatoshi, neatly tucked into the bed with the comforter at his chin, dead asleep. The blankets were tucked so tightly around his body that he looked like a little baked potato wrapped in foil, ready to be taken out of the oven. Tendou snickered at the comparison.

Wanting to make sure Wakatoshi was truly asleep, Satori waved a hand in front of his face and even went as far as lightly slapping the boy’s cheek, increasing his force just slightly every time. When Wakatoshi made no move to wake up, Satori chuckled again. _Wakatoshi really does sleep like the dead_ , he thought to himself.

Changing into his own pajamas, Satori pulled back the comforter and slid his way into the bed next to Wakatoshi’s sleeping form. He turned off the light on the bedside table and noted the clock beside it reading 3:17 AM. Good thing Toshi didn’t have practice tomorrow.

With one final sigh, Satori snuggled in close to the boy next to him, mumbling out a soft “goodnight Toshi-chan” and drifting off to sleep.

––––––––––––––––––––

Wakatoshi woke up to the loud screams of BabyMetal playing from the kitchen of their dorm.

It did nothing to help the incessant pounding in his temples.

He groaned, not wanting to leave the warm blanket burrito he had somehow managed to create in his drunken stupor last night. It was exceptionally comfortable. He felt like a baked potato.

Apparently, Tendou heard his groan from the kitchen, running inside the bedroom wearing a lace trimmed apron and blue oven mitts. He held a warm smile on his face and an oily spatula in his hand as he waved excitedly to Wakatoshi. He might have found it tremendously endearing had he not felt like choking on his own vomit.

“Toshi-chan! You’re awake!” Tendou cheered, eyes crinkled as he sat next to Wakatoshi on the bed. “How are you feeling? You went a little crazy last night.”

All Wakatoshi could do was groan low in his throat and burrow deeper into his blanket burrito as the pounding in his head increased. Satori was insensitive so he cackled at Wakatoshi’s current state, high-pitched and _loud_. It went straight to his headache.

“BAHAHA! I knew this would happen. You’re hungover, silly! Don’t worry though,” Tendou placacted, moving a glass of liquid and a couple of pills towards him on the bedside table. “I got you some pedialyte and ibuprofen to make it better. Oh! And I’m making pancakes and bacon and–”

“Satori,” Wakatoshi interrupted, eyes trained on the ceiling above him.

“Hmm?”

“Please don’t ever let me consume alcohol again.”

“BAHAHA! Silly, silly Toshi-chan!” Tendou cackled, doubling over on the bed laughing as tears threatened to spill from his eyes.

Wakatoshi wasn’t one to party and he certainly didn’t think he would be one after this experience. 

(Though seeing Satori like this may have him reconsider.)

**Author's Note:**

> USHITEN STANS RISE pls leave a comment even if its to just say hello i would like to make as many friends in this fandom as possible so dont be shy! and shucks, leave a kudos while ur at it too 😌 ily all even tho i dont know u
> 
> pls be my friend:  
> [twitter](https://twitter.com/MAGENTAFUL)  
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